Just thought you all would be interested to know that recently I ran into the directors of JOHUD and ZENID in the hallway at the end of the work day; I knew there was a visit from Princess Basma scheduled, but I was not invited to the party so to speak. They were speaking with a lady who looked familiar but I was unsure of who she was. Of course, I greeted both directors warmly with the customary kisses on the air, touching cheeks cheeks (the more there are and the longer the pause = the closer you are to that person.. I’m up around 4 each with a slightly longer one at the end, 1 on one side then three on the other, don’t ask me why). We exchanged the customary enquiries about each others health etcetera, and they both thanked me for their Christmas cards (bonus points!) as they were moving towards the door, at which point they insisted I make the acquaintance of the lady whom I had not met before. She was introduced to me as ‘Farah’, and she shook my hand and exclaimed ‘ah, Lindsey! It’s very nice to meet you…everyone speaks very highly of you!’
Only once I got on the bus did my friend jokingly say to me ’so, I should be keeping closer to you hey? a private audience with royalty; pretty good for 6 weeks in!’ I played it out as long as I could as I knew she definitely was not Princess Basma… I finally had to ask and it was her daughter, Farah Daghestani, the former director of the center I work at now and a strong women’s rights advocate. Have I mentioned how lucky I am to be surrounded by such inspiring women?
I just got back from another huge meal of Mansaf… we were at the house of the director of Finance for JOHUD, a beautiful grand place – well, lets just say her neighbour is the king, and I’m sure you can imagine how elegant it was without being too large or overstated. I think almost every tree in Amman is in his backyard, but that is besides the point. It was a group of about 30 women working in the organization, from the young educated environmental champions I had the pleasure of working with at JOHUD the week I prepared for the conference on water, to the ‘old warriors’, who have been focusing their efforts on the rights of the marginalized far longer than I have been on this earth. It was nice to be in a gathering that was completely warm and inviting; a place where many ladies were able to ‘let their hair down’, literally out of the hejab, as there were no men to unintentionally attract by this glimpse of beauty.
Why is it that only here have I felt the solidarity and pride of being a confident educated woman, in amongst this group of similar minded strong females? I never really thought I would end up working in the womens empowerment unit, or that it would facilitate such a burst of self discovery in me. I never really liked womens studies in University; I always thought it was full of a bunch of man-hating theorists who use the gender lens as a reason to divide and blame rather than unite.
Maybe I am feeling the warmth and purpose of keeping the company of these women close to my heart now because this is a space where the women’s rights movement my generation has almost forgotten is still so very current, and gives a context to and a reason to celebrate the achievements of all in the room. I think this is the thing I least expected, and ultimately the thing I will take away from this – it is important to identify with those who inspire you, and the Jordanian women I have met all give me too many reasons to keep learning, keep improving myself, and keep striving to become the kind of woman I want to be.
Most of these women I had the pleasure of speaking with moves in conversation so easily between Arabic and English, speaking of family members they have in Canada (apparently half of Jordan lives there), the War in Gaza, the traditions I need to be a part of, current affairs and how they are playing their part in the Jordanian context, and invitations to their home if I ever have the opportunity to come.
I only wish I didn’t have to just smile politely at the women I am barely able to say more than hello to in Arabic; who knows what insights they hold that I will never learn as I constantly face the barrier of language? It is the thing that is most challenging to me every day, and the one reason there is a pedelum swinging throughout the meal between feeling completely at ease and feeling like I don’t belong.
